TOFURKY ROAST

You gotta try this! It's so good. It doesn't even taste like turkey! That's what's so good about it. Well, maybe it tastes a little like turkey but not too much. Just go to the grocery store and pick up a box of "The Original Tofurky". Bring it home and put it in a baking dish with olive oil and baby carrots. Cover it with foil and then bake it at 350 for 1 hour and 15 minutes. Pop it out of the oven; slice it and serve it with veggie gravy and cranberry sauce! It's Awesome.

Aunt Weezie's Pepper Relish

Glopping a heap of my Aunt Louise's tangy sweet pepper relish on a helping of steaming hot turnip greens pretty much is thanksgiving dinner for me!~ My Great Aunt Louise, also known as Aunt Weezie or Trick, used to make pepper relish with her sisters, Aunt Anne, who goes by Annie Dumplin, Nannie, or just Dumplin, Aunt Deanie, Aunt Bettty, a.k.a Dog, and their mother Mary Estelle Daisy Carpenter, who was my Great Grandmother known to everyone as MemMaw.
They would sit outside at a picnic table down on the farm cutting, grinding, and talking. The peppers they used were local and fresh and probably sometimes came straight from my Great Grandfather's farm. His name was Pete but everyone knew him as Possum. He was very tall and extremely thin with a head full of snow white hair. He wore long johns even when it was hot out. He talked really soft and low. It was hard to tell what he was saying at times. Possum would always bring us fresh food from his fields. He liked to play a little joke on us called "let me milk your mouse". I don't know how this all started but he would say "give me your finger, let me milk your mouse" and he would bend our ring finger down at the top bend and pinch it just a little til it almost hurt. That was "milking your mouse" ???
I apologize for the trip down memory lane but it's important to know that making pepper relish is special to me because it reminds me of all those loved ones now that most of them have passed away.

So.... Pepper Jelly. Aunt Louise was the one who made this most often with and with out the rest of the crew so that is why we call it Aunt Weezie's Pepper Relish. I called her for these instructions.

Here's the recipe:
12 large red peppers = 3 1/2 lbs
12 green peppers = 3 1/2 lbs
12 med onions = 3 lbs
1 TB spn celery seed
1 cup apple cider vinegar
4 cups sugar
12 mason jars and lids (1/2 pint)
1 old fashioned meat grinder/vegetable chopper (I purchased mine at Sur La Table for $30.00)
Do not use a food processor. It will turn your relish to mush!
1 pair of safety goggles
1 bandanna

This recipe is very messy and is best done with help from a friend or sibling. I know now why they made it outside!~
Screw your grinder to the edge of a table or counter. Make sure you have it set up with the coarse blade. Place a large pot under the hand crank to catch all the pepper and onion juice.
Wash and prepare your peppers by removing the guts and cutting them in to med sized strips.
Put on your safety goggles and tie the bandanna around your face above your nose. Peel the onions. Cut in to med sized strips.
Now you're ready to grind. This is when it comes in especially handy to have a helper.Be sure to wear your goggles and bandanna while grinding the onions.

When you're done grinding leave pepper and onion mixture in a large pot over night with a cup of salt mixed in it.

The next day rinse the mixture really, really well and let it sit draining in a giant colander for a few hours.

Now you're finally ready to make your relish. Bring pepper and onion mix to a boil with 1 cup apple cider vinegar, 1 TB spoon celery seed, and 4 cups of sugar. Stir and boil on a med heat for about a half an hour. Keep an eye on this it may not take that long. You just want to simmer the liquid down. Taste periodically and add more sugar or vinegar until it's to your liking. If you want to you can add some Cayenne pepper to the mix.

While your relish is simmering bring another large pot of water to a boil and one more smaller pot of water to boil. You will use these to sterilize your jars. Put the glass jars in the big pot. Use tongs to maneuver them on to their sides and around. Place the lids in the other pot. Cut those back to a simmer and when your relish is done start scooping it in to the hot jars up to about 2 inches from the top. Set the filled jars on a tea towel and place the lid with the sealer ring on the jar. Place the screw lid over it but don't screw it down all the way. The jars need to seal themselves which can take up to 24 hours. You should hear them make a sucking or popping sound when they seal. Then you can screw the lid down the rest of the way.
Label and deliver to your friends and family.

I hope you like this recipe.
I had a lot of fun making it.

TWO SUMMER DRINK RECIPES USING PEAR JUICE! LIGHT AND EASY:

I love mixing up a cocktail anytime of year but most especially in the summer when fresh fruit is available. Before I jot down these two drink recipes I've concocted I'd like to mention Imbibe magazine which has been an inspiration to me. I signed up for a subscription after reading an issue from cover to cover over at my friend Liz's house. I tore out the insert and sent it off right away. I love this magazine for it's in depth information on beverages of all sorts; coffee, tea, and spirits being the main focus. The photography is nice too. Here's a link to Imbibes website: http://www.imbibemagazine.com/default.htm
CHECK IT OUT!

Also, being on the topic of quality cocktails I'd like to tell you about "PDT" or "Please Don't Tell", a speak easy in New York City that everyone seems to be telling everyone else about! They even have a website (http://www.pdtnyc.com/) so I'm assuming the marketing idea of please don't tell, which really means please tell everyone you know, has been a good one. If you want to go you must make a reservation! The last time I went up to NYC to visit my best friend Kate, I had been reading a book titled the same as the magazine, Imbibe, by David Wondrich, about the history of American mixology and "Professor" Jerry Thomas one of the most famous bartenders ever. He was more than just a bar tender, he was more like a bar scientist. There are about 100 antique cocktail recipes in this book. I was dying to try one. You can't find some of the old ingredients anymore and some are just hard to get which makes them a rare, rare, find in a bar. BUT.... so I've been told, there are a few swanky places in New York that can transport you back to the 19th century with an intoxicating punch, sour, toddie, or flip. You just have to be willing to plan ahead by making reservations! I learned that the hard way. Kate had scouted out a great place that was supposed to have real absinthe and a full bar stocked with rose water and lavender water, and such but when we got there for happy hour at 7:00 pm they were closed for a private party! The door guard was nice enough to direct us to another bar around the corner. It was a sweet little nook with dim light and lots of red accents. We took a pass at the menu only to discover there were no liqueur drinks available. The bartendress informed us that we were in a beer and wine cocktail bar. Bad news for me since I had just found out that I was allergic to everything under the sun the week before, including grapes, malt, and barley! So.... no wine or beer for me! Booo hooooo. I'm plagued! The peach of a bartender was also kind enough to tell us about another place, a secret spot around another corner. She leaned in and said "Why don't you try PDT? You go down around the corner and look for a hot dog stand. Go in the restaurant behind the stand, (which also sells hot dogs) look to your left and you'll see a phone booth. Go in the phone booth and pick up the phone." That's all she said! We tipped her and hit the pavement. Happy hour was nearing an end and we were yet to have a sip! Sure enough we found the phone booth just beyond the hot dogs. Kate and I were like Penny and Brain from Inspector Gadget at this point. I think for a moment we really believed we had stumbled upon something no one else knew about. WRONG! We picked up the phone.... a lady answered... she only said "okay" then hung up and a door inside the phone booth opened up! "Sorry, we're all full tonight. You have to make reservations." Nooooooooo! I only caught a glimpse of the interior but it was enough to see a stuffed beaver like thing hanging on the wall. I could hear all the chatter of the "planners" inside! DOH! Oh well, next time, next time! We slumped on down the avenue to the next open bar we could find and I just ordered the usual. Bourbon on the rocks. WOMP.

So... here are the pear juice recipes:

"Blueberry Pear"

can of pears in light syrup
fresh blueberries
rosewater
vodka
lemonade
ice

smash about 8 blueberries in the bottom of a glsass and then fill it with ice.
pour in 6 to 8 oz of juice from the pears, 4 oz vodka, and 2 oz lemonade
stir in just a few drops of the rose water tasting after each drop to your llikeness ( a little goes a long way )
garnish with a few more blueberries and lemon wedge


"Clementine My Darlin" my new favorite

can of pears in light syrup
clementines
Tanqueray Rangpur Lime Gin
limeade
lemon

smash about 6 clementine segments in the bottom of a glass and then cover with ice
pour in 6 to 8 oz of juice from the pears, 4oz Tanqueray Rangpur Lime Gin, and 6 oz limeade
sqeeze in a good bit of fresh lemon juice and garnish with a lemon wedge and a clementine segment

I hope you love these drink recipes. If anyone out there trys them, let me know what you think.

Blackberry~Strawberry~Peach Cobbler!

My good friend Shaun has been making amazing fruit cobblers for the last few years, and is always saying that they are sooooo easy to make. I couldn't believe something so grandma good was truly easy to make, but now I believe it!

I recently discovered a gigantic blackberry bush just popping with incredible fruit. I've been picking berries by the (WaWa large iced-tea) cup full! My hands and wrists are all scratched up from the thorns! It doesn't matter; these berries are worth it! I picked a ton the other day and thought it might be a good idea to bake something instead of just eating them raw since my lips were already stained and my tongue was starting to feel a little funny. I thought about muffins but the last batch I made was just embarrasing. I need to work on those. Then I remembered the cobbler! I looked up a ton of recipes on line. I compiled a few to come up with this one I'm going to pass on to you. It's really easy. I'm baking my second cobbler in a week while I'm writing this. The smell is so homey it's killing me.

Set your oven to 350, put a whole stick of butter in an 11 by 13 glass baking dish and put it in the oven until it's melted

Fruit:
1 large (or at least a medium) iced tea cup full of blackberries
1 hand full sliced strawberries
2 peaches sliced and pitted
if you don't have strawberries you can substitute sliced canned pears. I tried the first time and it was great.

Meanwhile:
Mix all the fruit together in a giant bowl and cover it with about 2 cups of sugar. Most recipes I read online called for more sugar but I thought 2 cups was plenty especially since there is also a cup of sugar in the flour mix!


Now, in another giant bowl stir together:

1 1/2 cups self rising biscuit flour
1 cup whole milk or 1/2 and 1/2 (I used the later)
1 cup sugar

When your butter is melted take the dish out and set it down. Pour your cobbler batter out as evenly as possible over the melted butter. Don't worry about stirring it.
Then dump your mixed berries over that and just spread them around a little. Don't stir the whole thing up. The batter will rise up through the berries while it's baking.

Pop it in the oven and set the timer for 50 min. You'll want to check it then and see if you want to leave it in for an extra 10 minutes. I do because I like the edges to get crispy.

One word of advice... you should put a cookie sheet under your dish while it's baking. I didn't do that on the first go round and now I have some sticky drippings to clean up! WOMP WOMP


Hope you like this totally unhealthy, delicious, indulgence! I think you will. :>

jalapeno mint cream cheese

This may not sound like two flavors you'd want to combine but you should try it anyway! It's really good! Just chop a nice crispy green jalapeno pepper and shred some mint, mix it in to cream cheese and spread it on melba toast! Very refreshing!

WARNING!! MANGO = SUMAC!!!!

I am allergic to Mangoes! It's awful! I love them but they do not love me! I think someone out there may have made a Mango Mary Voodoo doll and pricked it to pieces with a very sharp fork! Just look at my face!! That's what even touching a Mango can do to me. This has been a tricky discovery to make. I had broken out a few times (on my lips only) after eating fresh Mango. My lips would just swell up and I would look like Angelina Jolie for a couple of days and that was it. It was hard to figure out that it was the Mango because the swelling wouldn't start until about 2 days later!!!!! Also, sometimes I would drink Mango juice and nothing would happen at all.
Then.... at the end of this past December I turned into a monster for a week! One afternoon I started itching and my eyes started swelling and feeling heavy. I took a Benadryl and when I woke up the next morning I was covered in a horrible itchy rash on my face, neck, and arms. I couldn't even open my eyes! I thought that I must have gotten poison sumac from sleeping with the dogs a couple of nights before! They must have ran through a patch at the river! I had to go to the doctor. He gave me 3 prescriptions. I told him I thought it must be Poison Sumac. He said it looked like it was. I also told him I'd had a few sips of a Mango Smoothie 2 days before this all happened. He said he didn't think it was that. I didn't either.
Flash forward! Four days ago I made a fresh Mango salad. Two days ago I woke up looking like a hideous monster again with the same exact rash!!!

I went back to the doctor. He sent me away with the same three prescriptions and a referral to an allergist that I'm going to see in a few weeks.

I went home and jumped on line! I was shocked by what I read:
Mangoes are in the Sumac family!!!!!

The oil in mango sap can cause an itchy skin condition called allergic contact dermatitis.

File these under things that may give you a severe rash:

Poison ivy, poison oak and ... hold up ... mango?

Blame it on a chemical called urushiol, which is found in the oil of mango sap.

"That chemical is also found in poison oak and poison ivy, so people who have a history of reaction to poison oak and poison ivy would also react to this," said Dr. James Sweet of the Asthma, Allergy and Sinus Center of Hawaii. "They should be cautious about handling mango."

SO......... If you are allergic to poison ivy, oak, or sumac PLEASE be careful with Mangoes!! They are dangerous!!!! Get someone else to peel them for you and only eat what you know has not touched the skin at all!!!!

I'M NOT ON A DIET........

.......I'M JUST ON A HEALTHY EATING LIFE CHANGE PLAN.........

Over the last 4 years I have steadily gained 2 1/2 a year. I went up one pants size and just recently I had to go up another!!!! Not a good feeling! I haven't seen my butt a lot over the last 10 months because I haven't had much access to a full length mirror, but I saw it trying on jeans a few weeks ago and I was upset by what I saw! I decided I was going to take action! I would start walking more, and stop drinking cokes, and stop eating desert.
Well, a few days later I had 4 slices of pizza!!! 4!!!! And a coke, of course, and then split an ice cream Sunday for desert!!! I'm glad I did it though! I made me so miserable that it's what finally put me over the edge. The very next day I threw away all the crap in my frig and cupboards; I'm talking a half gallon of ice cream, a coconut cake, good crusty bread, chips, cookies! I Scattered some out for the birds and then smashed to rest of it into the trash! It felt really good.
I went to the store and bought tons of almonds, soy nuts, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, dried fruits, fresh fruits out the wazoo, fresh veggies, flourless sprout bread, plain soy yogurt, and some rice. I'm restraining myself from pasta and bread (except for the sprout bread) for a while. I'm not drinking the cokes! Well, I wasn't; I finally broke last night and drank almost half a can for my desert. Cokes are my weakness! But other than that coke I have been successful in staying on the plan of eating only whole foods. When I get a sweet tooth I have been eating little pieces of super dark organic chocolate (75% Cacao)! Also, I made a mock ice cream that satisfies very well. I'll add the complete recipe later, but pretty much, it's just frozen banana, skim milk, and coconut shreds mixed with a little yogurt and dark chocolate flakes. It's amazing!
I've been making some really great tasting, nutritious soups, salads, and fish. I feel like I am going to be able to stick to this for a really long time! I'll be posting as often as possible. I am working a lot now so it might be in chunks but I really want to share these ideas so I'll do my best. Thanks!

It's been only 10 days and I have lost 4 pounds! I haven't gone hungry at all. I can eat whatever and whenever I want as long as the only foods I have around me are mostly fruits, veggies, and nuts! I need to go outside an blast those 3 cans of Coke I have left in the trunk of my car with a bazooka!!!!!!!!